Me: says something stupid
ED: It’s cause you’re fat
Me: fails a test
ED: It’s cause you’re fat
Me: accidentally breaks something
ED: It’s cause you’re fat
Me: breathes
ED: It’s cause you’re fat
Me: does anything ever
ED: It’s cause you’re fat
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- someone: ....have you ever considered....how your mental illness makes ME feel?! how much you're hurting Me????
- me: i actually consider that every single day of my life and think about how much better it would be if i was dead but thank you for your contribution, i love being reminded of how much of a burden i am
Honestly, not eating isn’t the hard part for me. It’s the waiting. Every moment of the day I just want it to be over: so I can go to sleep, wake up, and get back on the scale, so it can tell me I’m one step closer.
- Me to my friends: You need to eat and stay healthy
- Me to myself: Starve you fat bitch
you know what’s really hard that I don’t see a lot of posts about? Organizing your friends into categories of “fatter than me” and “skinnier than me” just because of my ED. Like i don’t mean to, and I love all my friends equally, but it just happens. “hang out with her, you’ll look skinnier since she’s ‘fatter’” and “she’s skinnier than you, eventually you’ll look better than her”. Sometimes I hate my brain.
And I’m always the ugly one 😓
me: *chugs water bottle*
stomach: *growls*
me: can you shut up i just gave you water.
You told me I’m look beautiful today but I couldn’t believe it cause I feel like shit
*feels like shit* *expects someone to somehow telepathically see that I feel awful and ask me about it* *gets irrationally mad when no one does*